2011

Argent: What do you think this year will be like? Cyn: The same as last year. Argent: Everyone is making resolutions to improve themselves. Don’t you have faith all those individuals will meet their goals, and with those improvements make this year better than last? Cyn: No. Argent: Ever the cynic, I see. Cyn: Yep.

Cyn: What if the world was created by an artist? No matter how hard we looked, we could never find them, because they would be outside our world. Like the difference between an author and their book. You would have to watch what you say, because the artist might hear you. A few lines there,… Read more »

Cyn: “Do not use the supplied installation CD-ROM in regular CD players. It produces excessively loud sound that may cause hearing damage.” Well now I’m curious.

Cyn: Stop! If you do that, you will die. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but eventually. Argent: Well, yes.

Cyn: Happy birthday! I had your cake and I ate it, too.

Bingo: But I – Cyn: Sorry, you’ll have to file that with the complaints department.

Valentine: Valentine’s day isn’t about love, it’s about supporting a multi-million dollar industry. Happy capitalism! Valentine: This oughta be good. Happy Valentines Day!

Argent: No matter what you do or how good it is Cyn will always have something negative to say about it. Cyn: That is not true!

Bingo: Captain Cyn… Captain Cyn, we have a problem. I… I… I can’t remember which button I’m not supposed to press!

Weather Forecaster: Taking a look at today’s weather forecast, sunny with highs around 70. Tomorrow’s weather forecast: firestorms sweep across the nation as we head into the first day of the apocalypse.

Cyn: After 20 years of friendship, after 30 years of marriage, after a lifetime of family… You would think people would run out of things to say to each other, but they never do. Why is that? Argent: ran out a long time ago

Cyn: The “Irish whistle.” A whistle only the Irish can hear.

Cyn: I don’t understand why brainwashing is a big concern. You’d think if your brain was dirty you would want it washed.

Bingo: Hey Argent, which way is up? Argent: What? Bingo: Oh… It’s just that I’m really bad with directions. Really bad.

Devil Dog: Computer problems? No problem.

Eye Doctor: Spell cucumber. Cyn: C-U-C-U-M-B-E-R Eye Doctor: Okay, now spell egregious. Cyn: E-G-R-E-G-I-O-U-S Eye Doctor: Your vision is fine. There’s nothing to worry about. Cyn: Uhh…

Waiter: I’ll be back in a flash with your order.

Cyn: An evil so great it fills the universe with darkness. Something so terrible, not even 90° can set it right! A careless, unsentimental horror! A being with no perceptible feelings! Dun dun dunnnn! Argent: I can’t see you Cyn, but I know you are back there.

Bingo: Aw, my program didn’t get printed right.

High School Graduates: Schoooooool’s out for summer! Schoooooool’s out for… ever! Woo-hoo! Dog State College Graduate: Aw, *^&#.

Cyn: What do you think of this hat? Argent: If I were to be deathly honest- Cyn: You would die.

Typos are Everywhre.

Cyn: Life is very much like driving. If you drive like a crazy person, then every one else, fearing for their continued existence, will get out of your way.

Retail Husky: You will pay for this. Bingo: I already did. Retail Husky: Oh. Never mind then.

Cyn: Who are they? Why do they keep saying things? And why am I supposed to know about it?

Cyn: I like to think the parking police will assume I have the right sticker if I leave them all on my window. They’re expired, but you have to look close to know!

Argent: Hello? Telemarketer: Hello, this is Spot from Hydrant Services. How are you? Argent: Oh, today has been quite dreadful. I feel sick. This morning I also smashed my paw in the doorway and tripped over a mess my friends left in the main hall. I then discovered the milk was spoiled when I went… Read more »

Bingo: Remember, if there’s an emergency, call… Raúl: Bingo: Hey Cyn, what’s the number for 911? Cyn: You know Bingo, I can’t quite remember.

Cyn: Here’s a useful tech tip: while it may be satisfying, smashing your computer is ultimately unproductive.

Cyn: Ooh, a comment on my video. ‘I can’t tell you how stupid this is.’ A bigger vocabulary might help.

Bingo: Chicken McNuggets. They do make sense.

Cyn: The fastest an average U.S. citizen can legally drive is 70-75 mph. So why do speedometers go so high? The more I look at it, the more I want to try…

Cyn: And now, a word from our sponsor. Argent: Orange. Cyn: We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Argent: What are you doing? Cyn: Collecting “proof of purchase” labels from things I didn’t purchase. ha Ha Ha Ha~ Argent: Evil, thy name is Cyn.

Bingo: What story do you want to start tonight: Jack and the Beansprout, James and the Generic Peach, or Harry Potter and the Chamber of Commerce?

Bingo: I wonder what it’s like to have short term memory lo Argent: What? Bingo: ??? I didn’t say anything.

Cyn: …And remember, proofreeding is very important.

Cyn: I hate captchas. Today I will show you why. The evolution of hte captcha: fish hook fish hook fssh yook Cyn: ???

Cyn: The plot thickens. Argent: Well, it wouldn’t do that if you quit adding so much flour.

Cyn: Here’s a fun fact. People only ever say ‘no offense’ right before something that is clearly offensive. No offense, but you’re boring. No offense, but that’s a stupid idea. Well, you know what? Bingo, Argent, Cyn: I’m still offended!

Cyn: A healthy dose of stupidity is no dose at all.

Cyn: I get nervous when I watch TV shows about psychopaths. I think maybe I am one… and if I watch it on TV, then I’ll realize… Argent: Didn’t you just say you were busy? You should probably get going… Bingo: Well, if we’re done here I just remembered I have something to go do…

Cyn: Make your day more challenging. Park in an automated parking garage and lose your parking ticket. Parking Garage: please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket please insert your parking ticket

Cyn: ‘Trick-or-Treat’ implies you get either a trick or a treat. And since everybody else gives out treats guess what the kids visiting this house are gonna get.

Cyn: Looks like we’ll have to put our heads together to figure this out. Bingo: But I don’t want to touch your head with my head… Cyn: I didn’t mean literally.

Legal Notice: This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, events, or places is entirely coincidental, except some times when the resemblance is on purpose. Walls drawn in this comic are not actual walls, but representations thereof. Cyn wolf does not claim to own or hold the rights… Read more »

Thanksgiving: Reminding you to be thankful you’re at the top of the food chain.

Bingo: The glass is half full. Argent: The glass is half empty. Cyn: The glass is broken.

Facebook: This message could not be posted to your wall. Okay. Cyn: No, not okay!

Bingo: It’s okay if you don’t know what you want to be yet, Raúl. You have the rest of your life to figure it out. For all we know, ‘the rest of your life’ might only be the next two minutes, but…

Cyn: How, exactly, does one make ‘gruel’? Is there a recipe? If there is, I really want to know…

Cyn: Oh no. Frequent Flashback Disorder.