Seagull Surprise

Cyn: The stealthy hunter prepares to take down her tasty but dimwitted prey.She bursts from the sand! Cyn: I’m stuck.

Surprise Seagull

Cyn: That’s right, come get this delicious piece of popcorn.Look, I put it out just for you. Argent: Cyn, stop terrorizing the seagulls.

Effort and Affability

Cyn: Most people aren’t child prodigies. They got where they are through some combination of effort and affability.It’s your life. You get to choose what you want to do.

That One Holiday

Cyn: You don’t fool me. I see you for what you really are.A bizarre courting ritual.

Sidewalk Spots

Cyn: Ever notice those black spots on the sidewalk? For a long time I thought they were a naturally occurring phenomenon. The spots were just a sign of old age.Then I realized.It’s gum.Gum hardened and tarred into the cement by the sun.


Cyn: I ate a hot pepper. Bingo: And we spent the rest of the day at the emergency room!

Pass the Salt

Argent: Please pass the salt. Argent: Please pass the salt to me.

In Person

Cyn: Will we suffer bullying with silence? Will we lie down and agree that it’s bad to stand out from the crowd? That if we don’t conform, then it’s our fault when bullies strike?No! No more! Together we shall rise up! Together we shall shout it’s not just okay – it’s great to be different!Who’s… Read more »

On the Other Hand

German Shepherd: On the other hand……Wait, I only have one hand!NOOOOOO

On My Mind

Dr Wolf: What’s on your mind? Cyn: What’s on my mind?What is my mind?Where is my mind?

How to Cook

Cyn: Hi, I’ll have a New York strip steak, medium rare, with a house salad.…

Dog Air Freshener

Cyn: You know how dogs smell really bad? Well, We invented this dog collar air freshener. Now you can smell good wherever you go! Argent: And what scent are you wearing now? Bingo: Bacon.

Everything Is Soup

Cyn: What’s the difference between cereal and soup? Soup is liquid with stuff in it. Cereal is liquid with stuff in it. At what point does water become soup? Is this melted ice cream soup? I don’t know anymore

Dogs in Black

Agent: Contrary to popular belief, what has been seen can be unseen. Agent: Turn your attention to this red light.


Bingo: Every time I have trouble counting past 9, I just take out my trusty bag of M&M’s. That’s how I learned to do it in school.Eight… Nine… Ten…

Broom Closet

Cyn: Hmm, what’s this? A broom close aaaaaAAAAAaAAHHH

Worst Cook Alive

Cyn: Well, I’m not the most horrible cook alive, am I? Argent: …Not for long.


Bingo: If my last name was “Butt,” I would change it. Cyn: To what? Something more refined, like Derriere? Perhaps Keister, or maybe Tush?

Prepare for the Unexpected

Cyn: Urgh, another bad fortune! “The smart thing is to prepare for the unexpected.”You can’t prepare for the unexpected! If you prepared for it, you expected it!

If Not, Ha

Cyn: That should fix your problem, but if not, ha. Hahaha. HAHAHAH!

Ice Bucket Challenge

Cyn: Argent, if you don’t dump this ice water on your head, you have to pay me $100 and give me your sandwich. If you do pour the ice water on your head, I’m only going to eat your sandwich. Argent: I don’t think that’s how it works, Cyn.


Cyn: Why does pasta come in so many different shapes? I’m getting wheel noodles. Nobody can stop me!

Blood Type

Cyn: My blood type is AB. Bingo: Oh. Mine is red.

Words Are Toys

Cyn: Women are handsome. Men are beautiful. Words are toys.

How to Identify a Cat

Cyn: How to identify a cat: Dog: walk we’re going for a walk are we going for a walk oh yes so fun let’s go outside walk and look at fun things outside walk oh I can’t wait are we leaving now is it time to leave will we walk fast or slow oh my… Read more »

Bee Vomit

Cyn: Hey Raúl. How about some bee vomit on your pancakes?

My Name Is

Pug: Why hello, Bingo! Bingo: How did you know my name?

Killing Time

Bingo: We still have thirty minutes before the movie starts. Let’s walk around the park to kill some time. Cyn: Murderer!